michi-iyo

So here comes heartbreak, like an ocean in my veins, like a monster in my muscles. like a fire in my throat. Here come the memories, One by one and then all at once, taking me, breaking me, making me, live through years of fucking, of fighting of loving of cooking, of making you tea, of having you close, of having you go, of having you always come back. So here comes the heartbreak, the earthquake, the forest fire, the tsunami, here comes the natural disaster that is me without you.

You’re the only one I’m letting inside of me but we’re in this together. So use me, abuse me I need to feel you like I used to, trap me and slap me tie me up and break me down enchant me, devour me, embrace me and enter me but don’t you ever leave. Forget me so we can rediscover what it was like the very first time. Make me bleed again, make us fall into a clumsy fuck and mutter me a dazzled thank you after you cum. but before all that could you please hold me close on your couch after a movie with your nose to my shoulder for a very long time because you’re feeling insecure and trying to convince you

You’re right beside me on your knees painting plinths in our apartment but I miss you because you’re not who you were a year ago That’s okay, nobody is, but when we bicker about who loves who the most and I say it’s me, I get scared that it is. I don’t trust you the way I used to. I used to be sure of you as much as I was of me but now I know you’re not completely mine, like I’m not completely yours, like nobody ever is completely anybody else’s I love you no less than before, if anything a whole lot more but I miss fucking in the woods and waking up at 3 am just to devour you whole, and yo

I was on the run and I ran into you. Turned a corner and collided face first with myself in your arms. I was playing hide and seek between anybody’s sheets looking for myself and I found her in your mouth, between your arms and behind your eyes.

I'm not sorry I loved you, I'm sorry I didn't love you enough. despite knowing how good you feel pressed up against me and how beautiful you are on a spring morning I'm glad that it is over and I hope you can be too, because in the end we might have broken more than just our hearts [like windows or collarbones or spirits or ourselves]. I'm never sorry that I met you, I'm not even all that sorry that I hurt you, because maybe the two went hand in hand like we did once. I don't have a clue who I am today or will be a year from now but I can tell you that half a year ago I was yours and back then that was enough. in the end we learned it

She said I was everything she was looking for but I didn't want to be found. Yet I was never lost, I wasn't even hiding. I was sitting stark naked in bed besides her all that time and I don't know where she went looking if she didn't see me. When I met her I didn't want to belong to anyone but myself. Yet I wanted her, I wanted her to belong with me and maybe she does, and maybe I belong with her, but not right now. I can't sit still, can't sit stark naked besides her in bed all that time while she's out looking. My chest feels like a time bomb but in a good way. I'm out ticking and waiting to explode, and once I do I hope I burn dow

I spilled my guts in an alley downtown, bent over my sister's bike while the first sunlight hit a new year. It wasn't very pretty, it wasn't very adventurous and it's hardly a good story, but it doesn't always have to be. New year, new start, and I feel like I already ruined it. I know I didn't really, I know it's good to burn every now and then so you can rise from your own ashes, and a wildfire was exactly what I wanted when I left you, but this is not a wildfire, this is the acid burn of alcohol and rejection and it doesn't feel very romantic. I'm not one for being alone or being together. I don't really know who I am or what I w

I thought I’d give you a try when I saw you swirling by with your flowered arms and sunshine smile. My favorite games are the ones I can’t win, and you seemed to be a loss at first sight. you caught my eye with your predator vibe, so I took a jump and without any plan of attack we tumbled into playing hide and seek between your blankets. there was a boy I loved once and he was catastrophic. but these days I’m going home wearing your hoodie rather than his skin in the alley behind his house. and it feels like freedom to smile him goodbye without a heartache-hit because you’ve chased his demons out of my veins wi

but I've got a feeling I will someday. Today is the second day of summer and it's raining outside, yet I'm sunny inside because I've got your freckles to wake up to. And I know this won't last forever but that doesn't matter 'cause you make me feel like it could, which already scares me enough cause we're way too young to think about forever. I feel too young to even think about next year. However I can think about you, and when I do it's sunny inside my veins. Come on close your eyes, let's not think about forever, let's not think about tomorrow, let's just find out how our bodies work, search for ways they fit together and ways they

you never left, we never stopped, but you never started in the first place, and I walked up and fell face first for you. if it’s a game of independence I’m playing strong but everybody knows I’m wrong, I don’t belong alone in a twin bed. I fell in love you turned me on and down and off, you pushed me out, and away, I’m okay with or without you, but I begged you to stay. you’re a shiver on my skin, you’re that sneaky voice within my bones, telling me to stop, telling me to go. and I’ll leave but we both know that we’ll both be back here tomorrow.